Competition?

I don't get it why do girls alway say they are not pretty when they are.

Why do they always say they are fat when they aren't?

Why do they always say, "I am not skinny enough"

Will they ever be satisfied with them self?

Hold My Hand

This life don't last forever (Hold my hand)
So tell me what we're waiting for (Hold my hand)
We're better off being together (Hold my hand)
Being miserable alone (Hold my hand)

Cause I been there before and you've been there

before, But together we can be alright. (alright)
Cause when it gets dark and when it gets cold we hold

Each other till we see the sunlight. (so just we can)

hold my hand, (baby, I promise that I'll do)

all I can (things will get better if you just)

hold my hand (Nothing can come between us if you just)
hold, hold my, hold, hold my, hold my hand, (hold my hand.)

The nights are gettin' darker (Hold my hand)
And there's no peace inside....(Hold my hand)
So why make our lives harder (Hold my hand)
By fighting love tonight(So hold...)
Cause I been there before and you've been there before

But together we can be alright. (yeah)
Cause when it gets dark and when it gets cold we hold
Each other till we see the sunlight. (so we can)

hold my hand, (baby, I promise that I'll do)

all I can (things will get better if you just)

hold my hand (Nothing can come between us if you just)
hold, hold my, hold, hold my, hold my hand, (hold my hand.)

I can tell that you're tired of being lonely
Take my hand don't let go, baby, hold me
Come to me and let me be your one and only (hold my hand)
Cause I can make it alright till the morning. (hold my hand)

I can tell that you're tired of being lonely (hold my hand)
Take my hand don't let go, baby, hold me (hold me)
Come to me and let me be your one and only (one and only)
Cause I can make it alright till the morning. (hold my hand)

Hold my hand, (yeah)
baby, I promise that I'll do all I can (hold my hand)
Things will get better if you just hold my hand
Nothing can come between us if you just hold,
hold my, hold, hold my, hoold my hand, hold my hand

Hold my hand, (yeah) baby,
I promise that I'll do all I can (hold my hand)
Things will get better if you just hold my hand
Nothing can come between us if you just hold,
hold my, hold, hold my, hold my hand, hold my hand.

Wounds...

Continous suture,
Horizontal mattress suture,
Skin stapler,

A surgeon know all kinds of ways to stitch an open wound.
But the emotional scars....
What can be used to stitch emotional wounds?
There is no easy ways to heal emotional scars.
Just think of it this way: Wounds of the heart are undoubtedly necessary.
That's because by bearing wounds in our heart, we can become aware of other people's pain.

The Truth

Speaking the truth is difficult.
People hide it for various reasons.
And the more you try to hide it, the more others try to open that door...
Without knowing what is waiting for them there.

Dear person hides the truth.
That is trying not to hurt their partner is a form of love.
Nonetheless, people try to expose those secrets.
and then they regret it..

Inside Of Me...

You usually find a miserable and a unlikable person deep inside u.
But when u are forced to face yourself, either u stop where u are.
Or u can move one step forward.
It's up to u.
We are not even sure if we are facing forward or backwards.
But we want to go one step forward with our incompetent selves.

The days that have passed, will never return.
But its also impossible to eliminate them.
The present you are living in right now, will become a memory of tomorrow.
In other words, your past provide evidence of your existence. If that is so, what should we do?
If something or someone from our unexpected past suddenly appear before us.
What should we do?

Even if every single hand helps, there are times when its hopeless.
At those times. The only thing u can do is.....
That's right....
Stay by their side by cuddling up and feeling them breath.
People can be healed.
However, What should we do when there isn't someone to cuddle up with?

M.I.A

I have been M.I.A lately cause i was too lazy too blog. It is not have any followers in the blog. I don't think people even read this blog. Anyway recently a lot happen in my life. Not happy and lively events. Through the years i age from a child to now what I am today, i realised that i have more unhappy memories to happy and enjoyable moments and memories. I dont know why but maybe cause I am unlucky to be born on this era. Other than having a good time with friends, there aren't much happy moments for me to smile upon.

This year, there are more down than ups in my life. I actually feel very down this year. Lots of unhappy events happen and as i am writing this i haven't fully recovered from it yet. However i will try to get back to my usually self. I guess things are some of the fragments you will encounter growing up but it is just too much for me. Everything comes in so quick, fast and not to mention a lot at the same time. It is like I got hit by a train. You can imagine i have problem from every aspect of life. From studies, relationships, family, friends, etc. You just name it. Its not a roller coaster ride where there is ups and downs. This is like i am sky diving but without a parachute. I am plunging down fast and hard and with no breaks.

There is also a problem i have that probably make my condition worsts. I like to keep things to myself. I don't really like to tell people or my friends my problems. I will only tell those i really really trust and there are only a handful of them. The reason i act so cause in the past i do share my problems with my other friends just to get it out of me. Having an ear and a person to talk to is nice sometimes. However instead of listening to my problems they make fun of it and make a joke out of it. After that incident i never would like to share my problems out. And for your information i didn't happen once but countless of times d. Even though I tell me problems to the people i trust the most, I am sure they will bored of hearing my problems everytime and will think i am annoying. I understand. You are human too. You also have problems and yours are maybe bigger and worst than mine. Hey... You don't see me complaining. I am sure some of you will think that way. Sometimes i feel that i am not appreciated also. I dont know why but i just feel that way.

It is nice to talk to someone when you are down. When you need an ear to listen to your problems, to lean on a shoulder and cry. This sounds ridiculous right? I am a male for god sake and i am talking like i am a sensitive or cute little girl. Maybe i am a male with lots of complication or to be more simple for people to understand, I am very gay. Either way just want to write something here to let go some of the things i am facing. I doubt that it will feel me better thou. Well better than nothing right.

Empty bus...

What do you see in an empty bus?
U see seats, poles and people of course and not to forget the driver too.
Or maybe you can also see the rubbish the people had left behind from their visit.

However to me I see more than that.
I can see more than just an empty bus with seats and poles.
I also see people but these people have a different meaning altogether for me.
What I see you ask?

Well I see people. People you get on and bus and people who leave the bus when it reach its designated stop. These people come in and out of the bus. Each particular person will get out of the bus and new people will get on the bus. At the same time these people will also leave something behind in the bus. What they leave? They leave their rubbish behind or maybe their forgotten belongings. Throughout the whole journey in the bus. This is what I observed.

The question is so what? These are what regular people see each day in their life. Nothing special about it. I can see what you can see also. There is nothing extra ordinary at all.

Looking inside it deeper. I relate an empty bus to life.
Why do i say so....?
Like I say before people come and go i the bus and empty seats are filled up and then they are emptied again and new people come in again to fill it up. So the cycle repeats itself and so on. It is the same in life. People come and go all the time. When they are gone we this emptiness in us and when we meet new people we feel more alive and happy maybe. However the bus will never will never be empty. The driver will always be there to move the bus to push the bus. We are consider that driver. We are what drives our heart to go on. To always keep pushing forward and to never give up.

When they get on or down a bus they leave rubbish behind. These 'rubbish' i would say are the memories we have together in the past, present and future. although we clean the bus and we remove the rubbish, there are still traces of it that we cant completely remove it. For example a coffee stain. It is still visible inside there. In out life no matter those are happy or sad memories with that particular person, we cant completely wipe it out and forget about it. For after such a long time it will still be there. As i say plastic take many many many years to decompose completely. These memories will be with us till death to us apart.

How about you see broken chair and rusted seats?
Well there are the sad part in life I could see. These are the scars left behind by the people who got on and off the bus. These are injuries to us but it can be healed. However not all injuries can be cured as there is no medicine for every sickness or illness in these world. How to you cure it?
As for a bus we can just replace the parts or buy a new one. However it is not that easy in life. Scars will stay with us and may never heal. Some i could say it healed but the scar was reopen by the people and yet again the damage is there again. Worry not there are some people who care and try to not make it more serious and try to fix it. Although is rare to find such people now but there are people like so. Just like a person offering his sit to and elderly person.

Having said so much this is what I see in a bus.
what do you think you can see after hearing from me.
Maybe it it will widen your view in certain ways.
Some will say I am just a mad person relating life to an bus.
Which side are you on is completely up to you.

Value...

What am I to you?
I am just a name you know or heard of
Just as simple as that

And that is my value

Bullet....

I bought a bullet for myself...
to remind myself to be tough...
No matter what ever challenge i face upon or task people throw...
I will face it and complete it...

Although a bullet pass through my chest...
I will still get up and stand on my feet...
And face what is in front of me...
For i bought this bullet...

Not just a symbol...
But a reminder to all...
what i am capable of doing...
and also a reminder for me to be tough...

It aint just a empty bullet case...
Its packed with gun powder ready for action and to explode...

Icy cold windy chill....

It has been a few weeks since i have said it out again and things doesn't seem to look too good. If i know this was going to happen i rather just keep my feelings inside of me. Lock it way and throw the key away so nobody will ever be able to unlock it. Why do you have to be so cold towards me? Am I the the type of person who don't understand people feelings? Am I the type who force people for my likings? Why cant things go back where we used to be friends? Is it that hard to do so? The fun and joyful moments we have together before all this happens. I wish to relieve those days. Those were the days....

Now I have been push aside and been avoided. Why must u be so cruel? I have done nothing wrong. Your message was sent out to me and i understand it perfectly. Just because u want to keep your friendship with her you have to treat me so cold and avoid me like that. I am also human. I also have feelings. I feel like what other ordinary humans feel too. Could u treat me like a friend and not like some stranger you randomly come across in the streets. I guess this is how is going to be then? Looking at me like i am not there. Treating me like you just know me and giving me that cold stare. Answering my questions with that i am not interested face and a tired tone.

what have I done do deserve all this?
Have I done anything wrong to deserve all this?
Even I don't treat people who are in your shoes like that.
So why must you do so to me?